Tagged: eff your beauty standards

Why I Wear White 

I used to be afraid to wear white. I loved the way it looked on others, clean and crisp, but on myself, I thought all it did was exaggerate my flaws and make me look like a refrigerator. I did everything to remain inconspicuous back then, assuming that being noticed equaled being laughed at. Needless to say,  I never really wore much white. 



I think a lot of women have had similar feelings towards white. We are taught that it makes us look bigger, and we all know that’s the worst thing a person could ever be, right? Ugh… 


That’s the problem though… From very early on, as soon as the world realizes we’re fat, we are given this set of rules to live by, which are drilled into our brains so deeply that we forget how ridiculous they are, and we end up truly believing them. 



Society is sitting there thinking they’re doing us some wonderful favour by teaching us how not to look fatter than we already are, while its really they, who are in need of a lesson, oh, perhaps on how not to be a complete A-hole? Yeah. That sounds about right.


So I wear white proudly now. I wear it as two middle fingers to the rules that have been laid down by generations of self-loathing people before me who never knew the joy of unapologetic self-love.


I wear it because, unlike society, I don’t believe that looking bigger is among the greatest of all evils. 


And most of all, I wear it because I love it. I always have, and it makes me feel beautiful! 


No fictional set of rules will ever be able to convince me otherwise. I make my own rules about my bod, how I dress it, and nobody can take that away from me!!! 


Top, Tess Holliday for Penningtons – here 

Jean capris, Penningtons – similar 

Scarf, Penningtons – here 

Shoes, Aldo – here 

Clutch, Aldo – here 

Post-it Notes

Every once in a while, I get an amazing reminder that I deserve to love myself as much as anybody else does. This time it came in the form of this stunning, sequins embellished dress from SexyPlus Clothing. 


Seeing beautiful pieces like this reminds me just how far plus size fashion has come since I was growing up and struggling to find clothes that didn’t make me look like my grandmother (no shade, granny got style— just not mine). 


It may only be a little black dress, but this Joseph Ribkoff design is in no way ordinary. The sparkle, the detail, and the curve-hugging style scream look at me!!!! 


The simple fact that options like this exist now, which are very obviously not designed to mask our bodies, but to celebrate them, is proof that the world is recognizing that us fatties are refusing to hide in the shadows any longer!


We have the right to be viewed and admired if we wish it, and most of all, to feel worthy of wearing the fabulous clothes that we love without thinking we are somehow undeserving of style because we’re overweight. 

I know we’re not quite there yet when it comes to inclusivity, but I’m more than happy to rejoice in tangible victories like this dress, because bold, attention grabbing pieces validate my belief that I, as a plus size woman, am worthy of shining, turning heads, and feeling sexy. 

Obviously, I don’t need that validation, but it sure is nice to have it. It feels good to know that all those years I spent being crushed over not being able to wear what I wanted are behind me, and that speaking up in the name of fat women everywhere hasn’t been in vain. It feels good to be heard. 


All of this is to say, be aware of those reminders, life’s little Post-it notes telling you to remember that the frustrations of your past were for a reason, and your hopes for the future are possible! 


While you’re at it, let me remind you that you are important. You are worthy, and your existence, fat, thin, or anything in between, has more meaning and influence than you may ever even know…


Dress your body the way you want to, wear the clothes that make you feel beautiful, do the things that make you feel empowered and strong!



Be grateful when your opinions are validated, but never depend on that validation to come from anyone but you. Remember that to love yourself, you must listen to yourself. Don’t dismiss your feelings because you think you don’t deserve to have them… I did that for a very long time, and one of the greatest gifts I’ve given to myself has been allowing myself the right to acknowledge how I feel as a fat person, with a voice as true as anybody else’s. 

Dress, Joseph Ribkoff from SexyPlus – here 

Shoes, Aldo – here

Clutch, vintage 

 

My Montréal + Fashion Week Score

Well, it was a success!!! Montréal + Fashion Week, which took place last weekend and brought diversity and visibility to the plus size scene in my amazing city, was an absolute honour to be a part of! 

Although it was super scary, I managed face my fears and host alongside Emily Roy, the creator of the event, (without passing out) all while draped in the showstopping designs of Pheline Couture and Amadora JewelryWe showcased a fantastic selection of brands at the fashion show on Friday evening, ranging from active wear, evening wear, to bridal, and our models, including my boo, Sabrina Servance of Big Women Big Love, the beautiful Rosie Mercado, and Montreal’s own Joby Bach, along with an entire lineup of inspiring women, totally ripped the runway!!! 

Saturday, after coming down from the euphoria of such a high energy event, I enjoyed day one of the Montréal + Fashion Week sale expo where one particular piece really caught my attention—this gorgeous hot pink leopard print dress from i.b.b.i. Collection!


It was more on the pricey side, but I tried it on and instantly fell in love! I knew I couldn’t leave without it.

The quality of this garment is beyond superior. Luxury plus size clothing lines are few and far between, but i.b.b.i. Collection is getting it right! It’s really exciting to see more high end options available to the plus size consumer, because for a very long time, our choices were extremely limited. There is a whole world of curvy women out there just waiting to drop some dollars on some luxury pieces and I love that there are companies like i.b.b.i. who are taking notice of this! 

 I was honestly really impressed by the whole line, and if my wallet had permitted it, I would have walked out with an armful of fabulous frocks; but I definitely went home with my favourite one of the bunch!As I was trying it on, already wearing a thick gold chain, Rosie Mercado, the face of i.b.b.i., pointed out how great it looked with the dress. Needless to say, when I rocked it out on day two of the sale expo, I wore it with my fave piece of bling, this extravagant, layered chain necklace from Ready To Stare, a designer whose jewelry seems to have been made to pair with leopard print! 

These golden baubles and a simple pair of embellished, black leather flats from Aldo, and my look was complete! 


Even Rosie approved! 


I look forward to seeing which brands come out to play next year at Montréal + Fashion Week, and I am definitely looking forward to all the places I will wear my new dress! 

A huge thank you to my bestie, Crystal, for snapping these awesome graffiti shots! 

Check out more of Pheline designs at Pheline.ca or on Facebook and Instagram

Amadora Jewelry at Amadorajewellery.com

Dress, i.b.b.i. Collection – here 

Chain necklace, Ready To Stare – here 

Shoes, Aldo – here 

VBO & A Burger In MTL 

It’s all happeniiing!!! Montréal + Fashion Week is going down this weekend (May 20th-22nd) and I am incredibly excited!!! 


Lots of you who are coming will be local Montrealers, but I know many of you will be stopping in from out of town, some for the first time, and it is a true pleasure for me, as well as the rest of the MTL + FW team to welcome you not only to this exciting event showcasing plus size fashion, beauty, and style, but to our beautiful city! 

Knowing that so many of you will be visiting got me thinking about all the best stuff my city has to offer! The Montreal Museum of Fine Arts, Saint Joseph’s Oratory, and Montreal’s historic Old Port, including a sandy beach in the middle of the city, just to name a few; but being the fat girl that I am, there is one aspect of this city that, even being born and raised here, still awes me — the food!!! 

I started feeling nostalgic and craving some classic Montreal fare, and one iconic spot that every Montrealer has been to, and if not, will definitely recognize, came immediately to mind! Gibeau Orange Julep, (AKA The Big Orange) of course!!! 


I haven’t been there since I was a kid, riding shotgun with my grandfather up to that gigantic orange dome for a cup of their frothy, milky, pulpy, orangey signature beverage, and I just had to go back! 


I slipped into a simple black maxi from Forever 21+, some cute gold gladiators, fringe earrings and my usual bobbles adorning my hands, and set out for a taste of my childhood…


The sun was shining on me as I sipped a julep, savoured a poutine, and sunk my teeth into a burger that if you’re from Montreal, just tastes like home. 

As I sat there reminiscing, I realized that I’ve come a long way since I was that young girl who loved cheeseburgers, but didn’t love herself… Back then I would have walked up to the counter with a hoodie tied around my waist to hide my visible belly outline, then hidden in the car to scarf down my food where nobody would notice me. 

This time, as I stood on the very ground where when last I stood, I was ashamed to exist, it felt like a celebration! Through plus size fashion, and becoming a part of the inspirational community of plus size bloggers and retailers that are changing the game for fat girls everywhere, stepping out with my VBO in plain sight to enjoy some greasy, glorious food at a picnic table in front of the world, was not only one of life’s little pleasures that I had long missed out on, but a sweet victory over the insecurities of my past.

When I said I was excited about Montréal + Fashion Week, it may have been an understatement, because I can’t even put into words just how proud I am to see an event like this take place in my beloved city, let alone be a part of it! 

I look forward to seeing all the beautiful faces in attendance this weekend, and whether you’re a Montreal girl, like myself, or in town to take it all in, I hope you know just how much your support of this event, and the plus size industry as a whole, means to me! 


If you haven’t gotten your tickets yet, it’s not too late! You can purchase them here. You can also visit the Montréal + Fashion Week website for more info and details on the event at www.montrealplusfashionweek.com


Dress, Forever 21+ – here 

Sandals, Forever 21 – here 

Earrings, Forever 21 –similar 

Rings, Forever 21 – here 

Bracelet, Penningtons – similar

Stained Glass 

I used to shy away from attention. I would keep my head down, avoid eye contact so I wouldn’t get noticed. I walked around like a ghost, somehow making my large, fat body melt into the background. 


I could hide behind any pillar, disappear behind any wall, and though my ample hips would protrude, they were invisible… I, was invisible. 


You have such a pretty face, she said to me… She was my thin, beautiful, popular cousin’s thin, beautiful, popular friend. 


The words stung like hot blades cauterizing the wound as they cut, numbing me with the smell of my own burning flesh… Flesh. Pounds of it boiling over, seething, bubbling and molten under my clothes. 


I went crazy for a while. I watched them be attractive, be desired, be lovable. I wondered what it would feel like to be lovable too. I thought surely, there must be no better feeling than that of being wanted. 

I opened myself to any attention people payed me. I searched for it wherever I could. Just flaunt what you’ve got, they said, so I flaunted my fear of being alone.


They came running, saliva dripping down their necks, drawn by the intoxicating aroma of a woman who believes she is worthless. I let them abuse me, use my fears to control me. I let them break what was left of the girl with the pretty face and send me to my knees in a cloud of dust and broken dreams. 


But I was lucky… As I peered into the rubble that was left after I crumbled, the sun shone and I saw a glint of light, dusty, cracked, but twinkling. 


I pulled away the debris, brushed off the dirt, frantically rummaging for those shimmering bits of myself that I might still be able to salvage, and the flecks of smoked light began to transform. 


Before my eyes, the shards came together to form spectacular patchwork panes, stained by my memories, my shattered hopes, and the beauty in my reflection that I had never been able to see. 

I watched myself become whole again, or arguably, for the first time, bound together with lead, only toxic if I let it in; and the colours, they were glorious, refracting the sunlight, swallowing the darkness, all the while changing any light that passed through, making it fascinating and magnetic. 


Coloured glass, the proof of my existence, brittle yet magnificent. Lead, the reminder of my past, reinforcing my fractured pieces and making me strong. 

When I rose to my feet, I was not the girl with the pretty face. I was the girl with the pretty colours, all shades of light bouncing off one another, emanating from the core of the body I once thought unworthy of shining. 

My design, intricate. My pattern, complicated, but mesmerizing, and my colours, true and indelible. 


Dress (custom) – K Couture Customizable Formal Wear – customize your own here
Trench, Eleven60 by Kierra Sheard- here 


Clutch, Aldo – similar 


Shoes, Shoes Of Prey – design your own here 

Showing Some Skin During Montreal Spring

I’ve been waiting for it to warm up this April. I mean, there have been a few warm teaser days, but it is still very much a brisk Montreal spring. 

By the end of May, when Montreal + Fashion Week rolls around, it will definitely (hopefully?) be feeling more summery, but until then, I’m not fighting the cooler temperatures. By the end of July, when it’s 30°C, humid, and my thighs have fused together from sweat, I’ll be looking back on today thinking I should have appreciated it more… So I may as well just enjoy it!

This gorgeous hi-low top with a plunging neckline from Point Zero Curvy Woman + is perfect for enjoying Montreal in the spring! I’ve paired it with some other pieces from their collection to create two fun, bold looks!



For a daytime ensemble, I simply tucked it into this grey knit skirt and topped it off with this cute, cozy cardigan!


It’s very vavavoom, with my black strapless bra peeping out, but when worn with a simple pair of printed flats, it keeps the sexiness of the outfit in check!


For a racier evening look, I took a risk and wore the top over a gorgeous handmade harness bra from HARNESSBRALOVE!


Lets just take a moment to appreciate the girls in this bra and deep V… Like, for real… Scroll as slowly as you like, won’t be mad! 


I paired the seductive duo (the bra and too top, silly) with these fab PZ Curvy Woman + leggings, and faux-fur trimmed vest, and felt incredibly sexy and empowered! 


A chic pair of black linen flats and a vintage clutch were ideal for a night out downtown! 


Sure, I may still drool a little in anticipation of warm weather, when I see my blogger boos sitting poolside, basking in the glow of the wherever-they-are-that’s-obviously-warmer-than-here sun… But springtime in Montreal, complete with its cold breezes and chilly nights, is a beautiful thing because, furry vests, cardigans, and of course, my cleavage. 


If you’re looking to enjoy all of what springtime in Montreal has to offer, be sure to get your tickets to Montreal + Fashion Week here (English) or here (French). 


Hi-low top, skirt, cardigan, leggings, vest — Point Zero Curvy Woman +, available at pointzero.ca (international, point-zero.com), or in store at SexyPlus Clothing 

Harness bra, HARNESSBRALOVE – here 

More On Montreal + Fashion Week (And My Wedding Anniversary Too)

As promised, my next few posts will be all about Montreal + Fashion Week — a bilingual weekend-long event celebrating plus size fashion, beauty, and style, taking place this May 20th-22nd at the Crowley Arts Centre, but today’s post is extra special! 

My husband and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary today, and I thought I’d take this opportunity to show off the arm candy I’ll be toting around with me at the even next month! (Yes! Boys are welcome to the event, so if you’re planning on bringing yours along too, be sure to get him a ticket when you purchase yours!)


I’ve been blessed to have married a man who is, not only my best friend in the entire world, as well as an incredible artist, but is also as style obsessed (if not more) than I am! I mean, this guy can dress, and I freaking love it! 

He also has a profound appreciation for, and understanding of plus size fashion (although the I credit myself for that part). 

I’m am also blessed that this lace dress from SexyPlus Clothing came into my life, because let’s face it, I look pretty hot in it, and my hubby agrees!




When Montreal + Fashion Week rolls around this May, you will be seeing us both there all weekend!  


If you’re coming for the fashion show, to the fabulous sale expo, to hear some of our inspirational speakers, or if you’re taking in the entire event because you’re just a boss like that, I’d be willing to bet that at some point, you’ll bump into us, doing what we do best, being awkward (me) and snapping pics of me being awkward (him)! 

Whether you’ll be wearing your man on your arm, or saving that space for more shopping bags, we are looking forward to seeing you there, and adding Montreal + Fashion Week to next year’s list of memories as we celebrate another year of surviving each other as husband and wife! 


Montreal + Fashion Week tickets available here (English) or here (French). 

For more details visit www.montrealplusfashionweek.com, and remember to follow @montreal.plus.fashion.week on Instagram, and use that #MTLplusFWstyle to show us your fave looks for a chance to be featured! 


Dress, SexyPlus – here  

Shoes, Aldo – here 

Clutch, Aldo – here 

Montreal + Fashion Week Is Comiiing

As most of you know, I’m a Montreal girl, born and raised! I love my city, especially its rich history and diversity—a veritable melting pot of culture and language, and just an amazing place to call home! 

The plus size community here however, has faced many obstacles. We are a group of people desperately in need of the unity it takes to raise each other up and support one another, so when I was asked to join the first annual Montreal + Fashion Week team as the official blogger I was, how you say, f*cking exciteddddd!!! 

  
 
Led by the fabulous Emily Roy of the blog Entre Montréal et New York, and Nadine Moore of the plus size boutique Catapulp, and moi of course, Montreal + Fashion Week will be a celebration of plus size fashion, beauty, life and style, right here in my own beautiful city from May 20th-22nd. 

I’ve been helping out behind the scenes, and was lucky enough to attend all three model castings, first in Quebec City, then Toronto, and finally wrapping up right here in Montreal. It was such a blast to see all those beautiful babes show us how it’s done! 

With all that running around, I didn’t get a chance to do a post about what I wore, but luckily I managed to shoot my favourite look of the bunch this week! 

  

This fly AF quilted gold number from Your Big Sister’s Closet was what I wore to the Quebec City casting.

   
 
It’s literally everything… Like seriously!!! 

  
  
  
It’s total perfection paired with my fave pair of white jeans from Penningtons!

  
 
And with its edgy fabric and elegant cut, it may possibly be the most glorious springtime piece I’ve ever worn! Just saying.

  
  

Especially when accessorized with a little LV, some baubles from Aldo, and my chic Coach flats! 

  

  
  
  

  
The absolute ideal look to wear to a fashiony (yes, fashion-y) type event!

I hope to see all of you at Montreal + Fashion week! I’m really looking forward to meeting and mingling with my followers and plus size fashionistas, so be sure to get your tickets (here) before they’re gone, and come see me this May!!! 

For more details on the event, please visit: www.montrealplusfashionweek.com and check out the schedule here

Purchase tickets at here (English), or here (French). 

Be sure to stay tuned all this week and next, as I will be bringing you more info, special announcements and discussions about the event, as well as tips for making the most of your visit to Montreal if you’re coming from out of town! 

In the meantime, don’t forget to use the #MTLplusFWstyle hashtag on social media for a chance to be featured on @montreal.plus.fashion.week’s Instagram! 
  
Top, Your Big Sister’s Closet – similar 

Jeans, Penningtons – here 

Necklaces: Aldo – similar

Bag, Louis Vuitton – here 

1 Body Chain, 2 Ways, and 2 Countries 

When I was away in Haiti last August, I managed to sneak in one one photo shoot. I never published the pictures, but there’s a reason why…

  

  

   
Everything was perfect—my Monif C. fringed swimsuit, my ASOS sandals, and of course, my Ready To Stare body harness… 

   

 
    

 

  

  
 
Perfect, except for the fact that I was wearing it wrong—because screwing up is kind of my thing… *sigh*

    

   

  

  

But the beach was exquisite, as was my beautiful fat bod in that suit, and honestly, even though I wore it wrong, the chain body harness actually looked pretty amazing this way too! 

   

  

  
So, I decided to shoot some fab pics back home in Canada, wearing it the right way this time (Duh!) with a fab Kiyonna dress from SexyPlus Clothing, to show everyone that you can definitely have some fun playing around with body chains! We’ll just keep the fact that this was a totally unintentional discovery between us, though… K?

  

  
  
   
 

We can also keep the fact that it took me nearly six months to get around to shooting the second half of this post… Because procrastination is also my thing…

  
  
  


But it all actually worked out, because the contrast between my natural, freckled skin under the golden Haitian sun, and my ultra glam look, set against the backdrop of an icy frozen lake, is truly quite amazing!
  

  
  

And the discovery that this body chain is much more versatile than I had ever expected was a definite bonus! 

  
  
  

Sure, I wish I was on a beach in Haiti again right now, after sifting through my vacation photos… But at least I know I have my body chain to add some pizazz to my swimsuits on my next trip, and until then, it can look just as awesome in the snow! 

  

Body harness, Ready To Stare – here 

Swimsuit, Monif C. – old

Sandals, ASOS – similar 

Dress, Kiyonna from SexyPlus – here 

Boots, SexyPlus Clothing – here 

Mittens, Little Burgundy – here 

French Curves: THE STATEMENT NECKLACE 

It’s the 16th of the month, and after being on a little break for a couple of months, I am once again ready to get back into the French Curves Challenge – an outfit photo challenge with the French touch, created by the stunning Vanoue, of The Curvy and Curly Closet!

If you don’t speak French, I’ve got you, boo! As always, an English translation will follow, just keep scrolling down!!! 

  
Il est encore le 16 du mois, et après quelques mois de pause, je suis prêt à nouveau à participer au French Curves Challenge – la collaboration entre blogueuses francophones de taille plus avec la touche française, crée par la ravissante Vanoue, de The Curvy and Curly Closet !

Le thème ce mois-ci: THE STATEMENT NECKLACE

   

Un collier audacieux a le pouvoir de compléter n’importe quel look. 

  

  

  
Quand vous portez un, il est la première chose que tout le monde voit quand ils regardent votre tenue, et comme son nom l’indique, il envoient un message très clair qui déclare, je suis fabuleuse et je m’en fous qui le sait !!!

   
Ce collier splendide a été fait à la main par Djénéba, une femme malienne, incroyablement talentueuse, qui fabrique des bijoux merveilleux avec des matériaux provenant de son pays natal. 

   
    

  
La fabrication méticuleuse de ses  précieux bijoux est sa plus grande passion dans la vie, est ce-ci est très évident si vous avez la chance de visiter sa “caverne” remplie jusqu’au bout de perles scitillantes qu’elle a procuré petit à petit avec chaque retour au Mali pour visiter avec sa famille.

  

  
  
     

J’ai laissé le collier être la vedette du tenue, et je l’ai porté avec un look très simple et chic, mais avec assez de panache pour lui faire honneur. 

    

     


Un simple legging noir, et ma tunique asymétrique en tissu léopard extra-fin par Nadia Aboulhosn pour Addition Elle sont les pièces parfaites pour complimenter cet accessoire impressionnant !

 
   

  

  

Dans le style de Nadia, une chaussure à talon met la touche finale sur le look. 

   
N’oubliez pas de jeter un coup d’œil à tous les statement necklaces de les autres French Curvettes ici, ainsi que sur Facebook, et Instagram aussi ! Aussi, rappelez-vous d’utiliser les hashtags #FrenchCurvesOOTD et #FlightOfTheFatGirl sur touts vos looks de mode !!!
 

The theme this month: THE STATEMENT NECKLACE

A statement necklace has the power to complete any look. 

When you wear one, it’s the first thing everyone sees when they look at your outfit, and as the name suggests, they send a very clear message that you’re fabulous, and I don’t care who knows it!!!

This necklace was hand made by Djénéba, an incredibly talented Malian woman who crafts gorgeous jewelry with materials purchased in her home country. 

The meticulous craftsmanship of her jewelry is her greatest passion in life, and it’s very evident if you ever have the chance to visit her “cavern” filled to the gills with sparkling beads which she’s gathered, little by little, with each trip home to Mali to visit her family. 

I let the necklace be the star of this outfit, and I paired it with a super simple, chic look, but with enough pizzazz to do it justice. 

Simple black leggings, and my sheer, asymmetrical, leopard print tunic by Nadia Aboulhosn for Addition Elle are the perfect pieces to compliment this striking accessory!

And in true Nadia style, a pair of heels put the final touch on the look. 

Be sure to check out the statement necklaces on all the other French Curvettes here, as well as on Facebook, and Instagram too!!! Also, remember to use the hashtags #FrenchCurvesOOTD and #FlightOfTheFatGirl on all your style pics!!! 

Collier/necklace, La Caverne de Djénéba 

Tunique/tunic, Nadia Aboulhosn for Addition Elle – old 

Leggings/leggings, Addition Elle – similaire/similar 

Chaussures/shorts, Payless – Ici/here