Fat Shaming

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Now, I don’t like to bring negativity to my blog. I’m always trying to stay positive and keep fighting the fight to take back the word FAT; but I need to address something today.

I recently shared a Daily Mail article on my Facebook page, about how women are fat-shamed three times a day – a sad reality.

The outpouring of comments that I received truly touched me, because so many of you have dealt with being humiliated based on your sizes, just as I have in the past.

I was tormented by my peers in grade school. I endured teasing, name calling, cow noises… You name it. And when I look back, the saddest part of it all was the brave face I had to show till I got home and could cry into my pillow.

I thought the bullying of my school days was behind me, until coincidentally, last night I was publicly, and directly FAT SHAMED, while enjoying one of my favourite unhealthy treats, poutine; and for those of you who aren’t familiar, it’s a sinful Quebec specialty, consisting of French fries smothered in gravy, and curd cheese – definitely not waistline friendly, but it’s my weakness. That and an ice cold Coke.

I posted about it on Facebook almost as soon as it happened, because I was just so taken aback by it that I felt an overwhelming need to share it with all of you.

As many of you know, I recently shared an article on fat shaming, and your wonderful, and heartbreaking comments blew me away and really touched my heart. I haven’t been TRULY made fun of in many years, and just tonight, while eating out (poutine of all things) a drunk jerk made waddling and fat belly gestures at me and yelled out “oh yeah, eat that poutine” (in French). I thought I would have been less humiliated than I was, in all honesty, and while I’m not upset, I was really embarrassed, and felt like finishing my food in my car. I didn’t, but the fact that I thought about going to hide to finish my meal makes me realize I still have a lot of work to do.

Just thought I would share…

It felt like elementary school all over again. That feeling of being mortified doesn’t change. Same anxious ball of stress in the pit of my stomach, same feeling of fighting back tears, same anger. I had forgotten what it felt like to be coldly, and deliberately humiliated. I’ve been embarrassed in other life situations, due to my size, the mortifying airplane seatbelt check, for one; and people have made comments or assumptions that have bothered me. “You really shouldn’t eat that”, or servers in restaurants asking me if I want Diet, when I odered a Coke – like, would you ask a skinny person that if she ordered it? Maybe, but when you ask me, I can feel your judgement as I say “no, a regular Coke, please”. Is it so unbelievable that I would want to treat myself to something that I love?

Now, I know that the server could have just been checking, to make sure she got my order right. And yes, it’s possible that it had nothing to do with my weight; but here’s the problem – fat shaming has now become so ingrained in people’s minds, that they do it unknowingly, without even realizing that they’ve been programmed to see us as weak, undisciplined, incompetent, and unworthy.

Big words, I know. And I’m sure my server had no idea how she was making me feel, and probably never thought of herself as someone who humiliated fat people, because society as a whole had told her that viewing me that way was normal.

The @#$hole last night, was doing it on purpose, his buddies snickering along with him, and I’m ashamed to admit it, but all I could do was look down and pretend I didn’t hear them.

Like is said, I still WE STILL have a lot of work to do, because through years of humiliation, we’ve learned to just accept being laughed at; and I know we’ve probably all been the victims of our own imaginations before, but the double takes in the street for eating an ice cream cone, or when you can’t fit in the booth at a restaurant and the other patrons can’t help but steal a second glance at the fat girl trying to squeeze in, the walk of shame to a different table as people whisper amongst themselves, they’re real. That @#$hole in the street – he was real.

But we’re real too; and we deserve to be treated just like everybody else.

Although I’m disappointed in myself for not speaking up last night, I know that I’ve come a long way. The journey continues, and I’m so thankful to have all of you, my amazing followers, alongside me for the ride!

The Beauty of Black & White

The Beauty of Black & White

When I see myself in a black & white photo, when the lighting is just right and I’m looking elegant and fabulous, I secretly wish that color didn’t exist and that I could look like this every moment of my life.

Don’t get me wrong, I love color; but there is something to be said for the timeless elegance of a great black & white shot! Not only do they camouflage a multitude of pigment related sins (like my rosacea) effortlessly, but the right B & W photo, with the contrast tweaked just perfectly, has this way of making anyone look like an old time Hollywood movie star.

There is a certain mystique – a curiosity about old photographs that I have long been fascinated with. What color was her dress? I wonder what color lipstick that was? Do you think it was red? Yes, red, it must have been red…

So add a little old world glamour to your selfie repertoire! Play around with your black & white photo editing options and let your inner Hollywood shine through!

The Beauty of Black & White

The Beauty of Black & White

When I see myself in a black & white photo, when the lighting is just right and I’m looking elegant and fabulous, I secretly wish that color didn’t exist and that I could look like this every moment of my life.

Don’t get me wrong, I love color; but there is something to be said for the timeless elegance of a great black & white shot! Not only do they camouflage a multitude of pigment related sins (like my rosacea) effortlessly, but the right B & W photo, with the contrast tweaked just perfectly, has this way of making anyone look like an old time Hollywood movie star.

There is a certain mystique – a curiosity about old photographs that I have long been fascinated with. What color was her dress? I wonder what color lipstick that was? Do you think it was red? Yes, red, it must have been red…

So add a little old world glamour to your selfie repertoire! Play around with your black & white photo editing options and let your inner Hollywood shine through!

Olive You

Army Green & Gold

Olive green is one of my favorite colors to wear and I don’t know why I don’t have more of it in my closet. I doubt there is a skin tone/hair color that olive green doesn’t compliment (and if there is, I stand corrected).

This olive green sweater with gold shoulder & elbow detail from Addition Elle is just perfect with a pair of skinny jeans and a cute pair of shoes, such as these leopard print flats with hot pink bows for an unexpected splash of color.

This is a great casual, weekend look that can be worn as is or taken to the next level with some chunky jewelry for a trendy, put-together look that is as comfy as it is cute!

Sweater, jeans, bracelets, watch and ring – Addition Elle

Shoes – Walmart

Necklace, earrings – Aldo

The Perfect White Blouse

The Perfect White Blouse

What can I say? This blouse from Addition Elle is absolutely perfect. There is no other way to describe it. It fits like a dream.  Its high-low hemline drapes in just the right way to show off gorgeous, round hips and it has just the right amount of detail to give it an edge.

I’ve paired it with mixed metal accessories including a chain belt, pewter colored, super-low wedge shoes and a simple cotton, black legging. A minimalist hairstyle compliments this very chic look nicely without adding too much fuss and a lined 90’s inspired lip gives it a sassy twist.

Blouse, leggings, belt, Addition Elle

http://www.additionelle.com/henley-blouse-with-studs/21529352,default,pd.html?start=3&cgid=AE&q=white%20blouse

http://www.additionelle.com/cotton-spandex-legging/723203,default,pd.html?dwvar_723203_color=Black&start=8&cgid=AE-Apparel-Leggings

http://www.additionelle.com/intricate-chain-belt/724352,default,pd.html?dwvar_724352_color=silver&start=4&cgid=AE&q=metal%20belt

Shoes by Rocket Dog

Lest We Forget – Souvenons-Nous

Lest We Forget

Today, as we should each day, we remember those who fought, gave their lives and continue to fight for our country and our freedom. We all lead busy lives, but please take a moment to honour our soldiers and veterans on this day for the sacrifices they have made for us, our children and for generations to come. Thank you.

Aujourd’hui, alors que nous devrions chaque jour, nous nous souvenons de ceux qui ont combattu, ont donné leur vie et ceux qui continuent à se battre pour notre pays et notre liberté. Nous menons tous des vies chargées, mais SVP prenez un moment pour rendre hommage à nos soldats et anciens combattants aujourd’hui pour les sacrifices qu’ils ont consentis pour nous, nos enfants et les générations à venir. Je vous remercie.

The Art of Sequins

The Art of Sequins

It’s not everyday that you can wear this much sequins while still keeping a casual, chic look.

Addition Elle really got it right with this gorgeous sequin hoodie! It’s the perfect mix of casual and glam and probably one of my favorite pieces hanging in my closet right now.

Paired with a dark denim skinny, a neutral cork wedge, some mixed metallic bracelets, tiny earrings and a sleek sock bun, this look has the perfect balance between edgy glam and soft sophistication.

 

Sequin hoodie, Addition Elle

Jeans & stretch bangle bracelets, Addition Elle

Shoes, Walmart